


We all struggle

by Untitled_otaku



Category: transgender - Fandom
Genre: Gay, Gender Dysphoria, Menstruation, Teenage Drama, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-22
Updated: 2019-05-22
Packaged: 2020-03-09 10:55:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18915526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Untitled_otaku/pseuds/Untitled_otaku
Summary: Hi  my name is calven. I wrote this on a whim trying to vent my story out. I'm 14 and struggling a bit I just want people to know they aren't alone.





	We all struggle

**Author's Note:**

> Hi my name is calven. I wrote this on a whim trying to vent my story out. I'm 14 and struggling a bit I just want people to know they aren't alone.

His name was Cambria at birth he always liked the name and thought it was beautiful. The videos he watched in 4th and 5th grade of his changing body made him uncomfortable and he didn't want to look like that. He didn't want or know why his chest became larger in 5th grade but threw a fit when he had to wear a trainer bra. He never liked his hair in his face so he cut it in 6th grade to the length of his shoulders. He stopped wearing skirts cause he never liked them. Bikinis didn't bother him as a toddler but he hated his chest being stared at, it's disgusting.Blood flowed from him in 6th grade along with his tears. His mom smiled and told him "it's ok sweetheart , its natural." His grandma died in 7th grade and he thought if she would be proud of him or hate him because of who he is. He cut his hair even shorter in 8th grade and rolled his eyes when his dad said he looked like a boy. Thoughts of a penis between his legs came more often than not, he thought about cumming on his stomach or peeing while standing up. He thought it was normal to hate his chest and wear sweatshirts to cover it at his age, but he thought of it. Was he transgender. No he's asking for attention, he's just a lesbian. Maybe he likes girls and guys, yeah that has to be it. He tried to like girls but he couldn't do it, he didn't like the female anatomy. His chest, he hated his chest. Why did he fantasize of his penis? Why did his chest swell when he bled, so he couldn't hide it well. He was in 9th grade hair; "very short" according to his dad, he was called a " dramatic little bitch" that year. He ruined things. Maybe his parents don't care. He hates Victoria's secret, he hates looking at bras; panties he didn't mind but it made him uncomfortable. He liked dick, a lot, so he liked men. But he didn't like how men thought of him. They thought of his chest and his female anatomy. They thought of him as a girl. He is going to remove his chest, top surgery that's what it's called right? He hated his hips and the way his chest was always out. God he wished he had a dick. Blood so much blood. He couldn't do it. He can't do this. It hurts he's crying. No. Stop .Please.  
He watched YouTube, "Transgender bottom surgery" " Am I trans" "What's dysphoria" " How to bind" " Effects of testerone". Help, he needs help. Maybe he is trans, maybe it isn't him being an attention whore. He doesn't want to be wrong. He'll feel bad.  
He's Calven now.


End file.
